Dear Readers and Friends,
As in every Life Coaching context we are examining, there are only small explanations and many questions. Finding these answers is our task, discovering ourselves and then improving ourselves and loving ourselves for who we are is the ultimate goal. As has already been said in several articles:
“A question at the right time can change your life or at least your vision of it.”
So let's continue the series of Life Coaching articles with the same pattern.
Last but not least, nobody can deceive themselves, they can believe they can, but if we don't accept ourselves and are honest with ourselves, nothing we're doing will work.
This is the safe place where you can show your True Self without receiving criticism or suggestions, just questions at the right time.
We must learn to discern wise, mature, and accurate thoughts from useless and destructive ones.
Cognitive distortions can wreak havoc on our lives if we let them. This type of unhelpful thinking can be reversed, but it takes commitment, patience, and a lot of practice, every day! If you want to put an end to these irrational thought patterns, you can start by trying the “STOP Card Strategy.”
Learning this essential skill can help you take control of your emotions and your life. Take a few minutes to read the steps below and start practicing! You can print out the downloadable STOP cards and keep them in your wallet or purse so they’re easy to pull out and use as a prompt when those cognitive distortions pop up!
STOP :
Don't act impulsively. Wait!
TAKE A BREATH :
Inhale and exhale slowly a few times.
OBSERVE :
What am I focusing on?
What am I thinking?
What am I reacting to?
What do I feel in my body?
PROSPECT :
Consider the bigger picture.
Is this a fact or an opinion?
Could there be a different way to look at it?
Consider what someone else would say about this?
How does this affect other people?
What advice would I give to a friend in the same situation?
How important is this situation right now?
PRACTICE WHAT WORKS:
Consider the consequences.
What is the best thing to do?
Do whatever will help you the most!
HOW TO USE STOP CARDS
Practice the first two steps frequently for a few days, several times a day.
Read the passages regularly
Carry your STOP Card reminders with you – Practice STOP by working through each step several times a day, every day… even when you don’t need to.
Start using it for small upsets – when you notice yourself reacting emotionally to something that’s happening.
Over time you will find that you can use it for more important and distressing situations. Like any new skill or habit, it will become automatic with practice!
Stop: Say this to yourself (in your head) as soon as you feel your mind and/or body reacting to some kind of trigger. This helps create space between the trigger (whatever we are reacting to) and our response. The sooner you use STOPP, the more effective and easy it will be.
Take a deep breath : Breathing a little deeper and slower will calm you down and reduce the physical reaction of adrenaline/emotion. Focusing on your breathing means you are not so focused on the thoughts/feelings of the discomfort. This helps your mind clear and you will start to think more rationally/logically.
Observe: Become aware of the thoughts that run through your mind, notice what you feel in your body, and pay attention to the urge to react impulsively. We can begin to identify the vicious cycle of anxiety, anger, sadness, etc. This helps us to defuse those thoughts and feelings and therefore reduce their power and control.
Perspective - it's about thinking differently - the mental challenge of CBT. If we take an emotional step back from any situation, we will begin to see the bigger picture, reducing the weight of those distressing beliefs. You can do this by asking yourself questions.
Practice what works : it is the result of the 4 previous points that lead you to a resolution of the problem and to the stop of irrational thinking with a rational, practical and functional help, right for you.
Thank you for your attention and I sincerely hope this simple exercise can be useful to you.
Posts
0 Comments