Dear readers and friends, Articolo Originale italian version
Today we will introduce a very interesting concept:
As in every Life Coaching context we are examining, there are only small explanations and many questions. Finding these answers is our task, discovering ourselves to then improve ourselves and loving ourselves for who we are is the ultimate goal. As has already been said in several articles:
“A question at the right time can change your life or at least the vision you have of it.”
Once again I ask you not to substitute an expert for this article, if you need help there are the structures and personnel suitable for this purpose, contact them.
GERARD EGAN'S EMPOWERABLE HELP MODEL:
Exploration - What's happening to you?
Challenge – What do you want instead?
Planning - How will you achieve your goals?
Implementation – Am I doing the intended work?
Exploration - What's happening to me?
We can characterize this phase with the question "what is happening to me?". And here we start by exploring our situation with absolute sincerity and if we used the three perceptual prepositions to do that it would be fantastic. In this phase, our main task is to rediscover or review our history from other points of view without making judgments.
Exploration helps us build a collaborative relationship with ourselves, where we commit to investigating our situation and discovering the problems we want to address. Exploration (which includes problem definition and analysis) is not just about identifying problems, but also about determining the resources at our disposal.
To achieve success in this phase we should use our ability to listen to ourselves : develop the relationship with ourselves, always ask ourselves open questions and summarize what we are seeing or reviewing with different eyes.
Some open questions we can ask ourselves:
- How do I feel about it?
- What was I thinking?
- How is it for me?
- What else can I say about it?
- Do I want to say more about it?
Challenge - What do I want instead?
Once we have the reason why the pain or deficit exists, we can easily shift our focus from what we don't want to what we do want.
This stage involves shifting our existing views of an issue, encouraging us to have a different perspective on our situation.
Because we are so unaccustomed to thinking about what we want rather than what we don't want, we can be reluctant to explore new perspectives and new possibilities; but it is the task we have set ourselves: growing up means taking responsibility for our life and therefore a much more in-depth and objective understanding of its circumstances.
We must learn to have more rational decision making using careful analysis. It can be helpful to brainstorm and encourage creative thinking about problems in order to generate different options when it comes to dealing with certain situations and achieving goals.
The techniques we can bring into a challenging phase are challenging skills; explore perspectives; implications; exploration of what is not said; Property; models and connections; “should” and “could” and negative internal criticism.
To help us in this type of work we can ask ourselves questions such as:
- What do I think the situation is from their point of view?
- What would they say about all this?
- Are there other ways to look at this?
You could also challenge yourself like:
- Is there something I overlooked?
- What exactly do I think is problematic about this situation?
Planning - How will I achieve my goals?
At this point, we have a good understanding of the relevant issues and what we need to address. So, now is the time to plan appropriate action by setting goals that may involve changing habits or changing relationship patterns. We should strive to be able to deal with our current problems while also learning new skills. Any action planned in this phase will build on the in-depth exploration and understanding gained in the first two phases.
As with any creative process, when conceiving potential strategies, ideas can proliferate and arguments can begin to become less clear as more solutions come to mind. We must try to maintain focus and select action plans that are feasible for us: those that meet our real needs, correspond to our aspirations and adapt to available resources. There's no point deciding on a plan that involves worldwide travel and expensive spas if we're in financial trouble!
The goal of this phase is to allow us to move from the current situation to the one we would prefer. Everyone has a different capacity for change, and while some people love big changes, others will require small steps. Creating realistic and achievable goals with specific goals over time can help in this process, along with the encouragement and support we can give ourselves.
We have seen several techniques that can bring many skills to this stage, including divergent thinking; definition of objectives; decision making; troubleshooting; assessment; creative thinking; encouragement of creative thinking; who can help us in this experience.
Some useful questions for this phase are:
- What are the possible solutions to this situation?
- Which solution seems best to me?
- What would I get if I did?
- What would I do first and when?
- What would I ideally like instead?
- What would I feel/do/think if…?
- How would my life change if this happened?
- What possibilities open up if I do this?
And here the questions should have ended and many answers should have been found together with a plan to follow, which includes all the work to be done to reach the goal we have set for ourselves.
Implementation – Am I doing the intended work?
The last remaining point is the next step to having a plan: applying it with commitment and seriousness. Put into practice the decisions made in the previous steps or stages.
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